If you see me,
do not judge me in my particulars.
With me, feelings and faces and meanings
One minute my heart is a vacant lot
filled with yellow weeds
and broken glass,
the sound of boots on pavement
retreating in the dark.
In the next minute, I shift.
I am a vagrant clothed in newspaper.
A truth teller.
An eyelash coated in salt.
I am a hard shove
pushing lies and my beloveds away.
My heart is a semicolon -
always trying to join unlike things together.
So if you see my mother,
tell her that she has always been my alphabet.
She was my first picture book
filled with text I longed to decipher
and old fashioned images
of rose-faced girls clinging to each other.
Tell her our edges will always be bound in guilt
because love bends over backwards
and still it cannot do enough.
If you see my mother
Remind her that for a reason
I learned to read her before I learned to read myself.
She is my A and my B and
I see her in flickering images when I am falling from this earth.
If you see my best friend
tell him I left
not because I hate him
but because I cannot stand to see him
playing the role of yet another sharecropper
standing before some faceless banker.
I do not want to see him
hat in hand, feet shuffling, rictus grin,
trying to explain why he planted a crop
and then left it to die under a harsh prairie sun.
Tell him I am not faceless,
and I am weary of adding and subtracting him.
he is not the farmer.
He is the planting.
And I won’t see him because lately when he’s near
I am as predictable as rain.
If you see my sister
tell her that the other day
I found a letter from a former lover.
It was penned in his pedantic, educated hand.
But on the envelope she had defaced him, she unfaced him.
On the envelope, she wrote our names over his
over and over again.
My sister is like our mother; she dreams in pen.
She added hearts, and stars, and planets dying.
She drew curly eyes with salted lashes
the way our mother taught us
when we were rose faced girls .
My sister sees me from afar.
So if you see Meg, tell her I’ve buried our love
In a jelly jar in our parents’ backyard.
There's this thing;
it's called Beauty.
but it remains
There is power in being.
There's this thing;
it's called Child.
It grows up
but there remains
There is power in being.
What line is drawn between naming and being?
Is the line just one of those things that changes?
I need this power of drawing lines.
To separate, to cocoon, to become my own thing
To remain a power
To maintain a being
Driving through dark haunting streets and alleys as I search the shadows of the night,
where trafficking abounds and stealth clad nymphs parade beneath the probing moon
to glean their nightly hosts and quench their wretched pangs,
And while I muse entranced upon the muscled shadows who wait like ghostly silouettes
for those who pay the fare to feast and gorge upon their manly treats,
in this must need be prudent most for over zealous troopers lie in wait, to snare and trap
and cuff with unspoken indignity those who venture into their device,
But most treacherous yet, peace impersonators who mask a smile
to tranquilize these outcasts while shrouding evil deeds, unknown but to the badged
who relent for now and see not naught, but cloak the heaviness of the deed at hand,
Bodies faces thrown against the brick and street, blood and tears now greet the smile
the face betrayed that was but it not more, exurberant cadres stand aloft above their
nightly prey who lay prostrate and defenseless, for time has stopped on these now
shackled here, who could not flee the brutal act usurped upon their liberty, unseen
but to the waning moon afar, who bears witness to the heinous deed,
But life goes on, and unto those not wronged by time or place for now but flee
into the deep of night as ghosts unseen, until the never ending wont returns again...
and while in flight and state of mind to bid good night , the beckon calls the more,
and so I think, O' just this once and then adieu........and drive and drive into the night......
I am God's child desiring to be found,
living on earth, soaring Heaven bound.
I am the light and the apple of His eye,
a graceful spirit flying high up in the sky.
I am the fruit of a newly blossomed tree,
down inside my heart, He will always see.
I am the river flowing into the blue ocean,
a courageous lion showing baffling emotion.
I am a mountain reaching as high as it goes,
the great north wind that continuously blows.
I am a flower displaying beautiful purple petals,
gold, silver, bronze, some of earths finest metals.
I am a rainbow appearing right after the rain,
sand on the beach, songs of a flying crane.
I am a pearl found deep in the blue sea,
truly one of a kind, Yes that would be me.
I am looking for a prince to come and sweep me off my feet,
Someone who I know without doubt makes me feel complete.
For years now I have given my heart away only to be deceived,
Love is just another emotion I knew i should not have believed.
However its hard to deny what is very evident for those to see,
No matter the situation, there will always be you sitting by me.
Its amazing to find the exact kind of person you want to be around,
they have a way of keeping you up when your feeling really down.
All it takes is a little bit of attention to make me turn my head,
There are many thoughts crossing my mind as I lay down into bed.
Sadly I cannot figure out who's heart will be broken in the end,
I dreamed of you being my lover, however will only be my friend.
Your soft sweet kiss tasting like honey butter,
those unexplainable words impossible to utter.
A touch so soft I feel as if I am laying in a cloud,
the simple thoughts of your love make me proud.
That sparkle in your eyes as you look into mine,
how could our God create such a perfect design?
When you reach out to hold my hand so strong,
I'm knowining it's with you I will always belong.
Whenever you smile my tummy actually turns,
It's only for you my free spirit desparately yearns.
The beauty you possess could not possibly compare,
It leaves me in awe, I cannot help but truly stare.
All your beauty not only comes from the outside,
everything inside you is also something I confide.
Such compassion and love can be a very rare trait,
cannot shake the feeling were destined to be fate
I won't fight against what I find so impossible to deny,
this is definitely something special between you and I.
Addiction is a deadly disease that does not have a cure,
no matter how hard you try to quit, it never is for sure.
The cravings will eat you up becoming your only desire,
soon you say, "Just one more time I know I can get higher."
As you fail to achieve the mighty rush you had once before,
that is when your mind tells you,"Go and get some more."
Next day your money is gone not knowing where it went,
starving to death lying around because your body is bent.
Tell yourself never again this time I swear I've had enough,
desparately needing to be strong the ride is way to rough.
A week later in boredom you pawn something to get high,
two days later, strung out, you can't help but question why.
Unfortunately it becomes a cycle that's impossible to see,
as long as the drug is in control, you never can be free.
You have to realize the power you have deep within,
that is when the true conquering of addcition can begin.
Here is a precious person, someone I know well,
the thought of life without her I could never tell.
Growing up I took for granted moments I cannot replace,
They have now become memories I am unable to erase.
I wish I took more time to show her how much I truly care,
there was so much of myself I could have learned to share.
But that is the past, today I have something I want to give,
Because with her in my life, she keeps encourging me to live.
No matter my mistakes I feel there is nothing I need to hide,
There is a trust between us I know I will always be able to confide.
Over time I see myself becoming more and more like her,
A Spirit of Compassion carrying the kind of love that's pure.
I'm thankful for my Mother, she is an angel wo carries me through,
Without seeing her daily in my life, I don't know what I would do.
written by :